I saw an instagram post that said, "Make the list. Make the list of what you won't miss. You'll be surprised at how much you've been okay with for far too long." I also added a list of things I would like to improve or explore for future relationships, if there are any. I have only been thinking about the good memories together. All of the pictures are good memories. Maybe I should look at the things I didn't like, just to make myself feel better not to disparage what we had. I feel like he did that already with his actions. Today was a hard day. Miss him and I want one of his great enveloping hugs.
My List About Him:
- He never asked about my day
- He never gave me compliments
- I don't remember him every saying he was proud of me
- He did not want to try new restaurants that I wanted to go to
- He didn't express any interest in things I wanted to do like the Cat Haven
- He didn't ask how I was feeling physically or emotionally
- He always walked ahead of me without waiting
- He called "date night" cringey
- He said he didn't care about anything to do with the house. Then complained he didn't like something. Like the new bed. I asked to go try out beds and he didn't want to. I buy one and he hates it. Then said he was going to get a new one when i left.
My List About Me:
- I let him pick everything, but I was trying to be nice and accommodating
- Maybe this was too passive
- I didn't ask the right questions or enough questions about him or what he wanted
- I should have been more proactive with "romance"
- I should speak up if something bothers me or I want more of something
- Don't listen to your self conscious thoughts about things and say what you want/need
- Be yourself, be silly, be kind, be honest, be straightforward
None of his list and none of my list feel even close to reasons to end a relationship. They feel like things you can work on together to improve the bond and the relationship. I would have put in the work.